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Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

John Mayer

Mon Jan 29 2024
John MayerJordan SchlanskySiriusXMConan O'BrienRadioPodcastPersonal GrowthShow BusinessPresentationMental HealthChemistryMusic Curation


John Mayer and Jordan Schlansky discuss their new show on SiriusXM, personal growth, interactions in show business, presentation, mental health, chemistry, and John Mayer's channel. They share anecdotes, reflect on experiences, and explore various topics.


Importance of Personal Growth

The speakers express a desire for personal growth and becoming less vulnerable by not constantly looking up to others or seeking validation from them.

Energy Dynamics in Show Business

The conversation explores the dynamics of energy exchange in show business, where some individuals give energy while others defend their energy.

Presentation and Perception in Performances

Audiences look for confidence in performers, and it is important to project authority and avoid self-deprecating remarks.

Appreciating Greatness and Overcoming Insecurities

As one gets older, they become more appreciative of other people's greatness and are less concerned with seeking approval or attention from others. The speakers discuss overcoming insecurities and finding freedom in not caring about others' opinions.

Balancing Subjective Experiences and Objective Action

The speakers reflect on the importance of balancing subjective experiences with objective action, acknowledging that spending too much time solely focused on subjective experiences can be detrimental.

Curating Music Based on Time of Day

John Mayer discusses his SiriusXM channel, "Life with John Mayer," which curates music based on the time of day rather than genre, aiming to provide synchronized music for different times of the day.

Chemistry and Humor in Podcasting

The chemistry between the speakers and their podcast team is highlighted as a special aspect of the show, allowing for enjoyable banter and humor.

Navigating Interactions in Show Business

The speakers discuss their experiences with positive and negative interactions in show business, emphasizing the importance of nourishing relationships and avoiding energy-draining individuals.

Reflections on Personal Perspective and Mental Health

The speakers reflect on how their perspective has changed with age and experience, discussing cognitive therapy, magical thinking, and the lack of open conversations about emotions in the past.

Favorite Episode and Personal Reflections

The speaker shares their favorite episode, expresses admiration for someone in the crowd, reflects on surviving difficult situations, and expresses contentment with their current situation and career.


  1. Conan and Jordan Show
  2. Importance of Their Show
  3. Introduction of John Mayer
  4. Appreciating Greatness and Personal Growth
  5. Interactions in Show Business
  6. Energy Dynamics and Insecurities
  7. Presentation and Perception
  8. Perspective and Mental Health
  9. Chemistry and Humor
  10. John Mayer's Channel
  11. Favorite Episode and Personal Reflections

Conan and Jordan Show

00:01 - 06:28

  • John Mayer and Jordan Schlansky are working together on a new show called "Conan and Jordan" on SiriusXM app and Conan O'Brien's channel.
  • Their dynamic is described as two mad dogs fighting, with John being the good dog and Jordan being just a dog named Jordan.
  • Jordan expresses skepticism about the show and feels there should have been more celebration for their achievement.
  • John compares his career arc to Ronald Reagan's, starting in television and now transitioning into radio.
  • They discuss the lack of parties or celebrations compared to when they were on network television.
  • Jordan admits he hasn't heard any episodes of the show because he hasn't been given a Sirius subscription or login.
  • John dismisses the importance of Jordan hearing or appreciating the show and suggests he go on the SiriusXM app himself.

Importance of Their Show

06:03 - 12:01

  • The speaker expresses frustration about not finding their own show on SiriusXM channel 104.
  • They question the importance and ranking of their show within the SiriusXM empire.
  • Another show on SiriusXM, where Sona reads the local weather in Venezuela, is mentioned as being more popular.
  • The speaker describes their show as discussing various philosophies, ideologies, and debating pronunciation.
  • They encourage listeners to check out the Conan and Jordan shows on the SiriusXM app by searching for "Conan" or "Jordan."
  • The speaker questions whether they can consider themselves a radio host and mentions not being media trained like other hosts.
  • They admit to not knowing what their show is about or what future shows will be about.

Introduction of John Mayer

11:42 - 17:45

  • Conan promotes their show, "The Conan and Jordan Show," and mentions that it is funny and can be found on SiriusXM Channel 104.
  • They introduce John Mayer, a seven-time Grammy award-winning singer-songwriter, who has launched an exclusive channel on SiriusXM called "Life with John Mayer" on Channel 14.
  • Conan jokingly compares his own channel number (104) to John Mayer's (14).
  • They discuss how John Mayer was invited to be on the podcast after waiting for a long time.
  • They engage in friendly banter about who is the better musician, with Conan admitting that John Mayer is a virtuoso.
  • Conan recalls how he felt discouraged when he saw John Mayer play Bob Dylan's song "Bucket's of Rain" at a benefit concert years ago.

Appreciating Greatness and Personal Growth

17:23 - 23:14

  • Seeing someone incredibly talented and skilled can be comforting and calming, as it takes the pressure off of one's own performance.
  • The speaker shares a personal story about being in the presence of Jeff Beck, a renowned musician, and feeling relieved because they didn't have to worry about playing the guitar perfectly since Beck was there.
  • As one gets older, they become more appreciative of other people's greatness and are less concerned with seeking approval or attention from others.
  • The speaker reflects on past experiences at parties where they would feel sad and discouraged by not receiving validation or attention from beautiful women. However, now they have learned not to care about others' opinions and find freedom in that mindset.
  • They discuss the perception of beauty and express empathy towards beautiful women who may not experience certain things due to societal expectations or assumptions.
  • The conversation shifts to leaving parties feeling empty or wounded spiritually after engaging with people who drain energy. It is acknowledged that everyone is susceptible to feeling small or misunderstood in social situations, regardless of their achievements.
  • The speaker mentions their admiration for musicians who can perform without constant judgment from the audience, unlike comedians who may face immediate criticism during performances.
  • They compare themselves to Dean Martin, someone who exuded confidence and coolness in any situation, while acknowledging that they personally struggle with deferring emotionally to others instead of asserting themselves.
  • Both speakers express a desire for personal growth and becoming less vulnerable by not constantly looking up to others or seeking validation from them.

Interactions in Show Business

28:52 - 34:49

  • The speaker had a scary experience where they got yelled at and had to do push-ups.
  • They have mixed feelings about their job at SNL, acknowledging that it changed their life and they learned a lot there.
  • The speaker's curiosity sometimes comes across as criticism, but it is just their way of expressing themselves.
  • There is a discussion about a funny encounter with Tom Hanks, who has the ability to make people feel better.
  • The speaker mentions having negative interactions with certain unnamed comedians that left them feeling diminished.
  • They describe the feeling of being nourished after positive interactions with others and feeling small after negative ones.
  • The speaker believes that some people are "nourishers" who give energy, while others defend their energy. They consider themselves a nourisher.

Energy Dynamics and Insecurities

34:31 - 40:30

  • Not everyone in comedy or show business has the same mindset of giving to others and expecting nothing in return.
  • Some people in these industries preserve their energy and are not inclined to give as much.
  • There can be a polarity issue between givers and defenders, where givers may choose to leave when interacting with defenders.
  • Certain individuals emit negative energy that can be sensed by others even before seeing them.
  • Knowing this, some people may choose to give less or avoid interacting with certain individuals as a self-protection method.
  • The conversation mentions Pat Sejek and an incident involving him putting something on the wheel of a game show, possibly feces.
  • The discussion shifts to music and how the speaker has always put it on a pedestal, but realizes that even if they were successful in music, they would still have insecurities about whether the audience likes their songs or wants to hear them.
  • The fear of not playing what the audience wants can cause anxiety for musicians with diverse catalogs of songs.

Presentation and Perception

40:04 - 46:09

  • Audiences as a group are highly intelligent and look for confidence in performers.
  • It is important for performers to project authority and not apologize or make self-deprecating remarks on stage.
  • The way something is presented, including the speaker's intent, plays a significant role in how it is received.
  • Presentation and intent are crucial in comedy and music performances.
  • President Biden speaks quietly but effectively, while former President Trump often says outrageous things with great volume.

Perspective and Mental Health

45:43 - 52:27

  • The speaker reflects on how their perspective has changed with age and experience.
  • They mention a quote from someone like George Wallace about giving the show they have to offer.
  • The speaker discusses the difference between giving a good show and having a good show.
  • They describe a technique they use to check if they are performing well, including factors like song choice, key, language, and appearance.
  • The conversation shifts to cognitive therapy and how it helps challenge negative thoughts by examining evidence of success and achievements.
  • The speakers acknowledge that humans have engaged in magical thinking throughout history to explain the unexplained.
  • They speculate on how previous generations might have described their feelings without the modern understanding of mental health.
  • The discussion touches on the lack of open conversations about emotions in the past and the societal pressure to move forward after experiencing grief or loss.
  • There is a recognition that while it's important to acknowledge subjective experiences, spending too much time solely focused on them can be detrimental.

Chemistry and Humor

51:58 - 58:35

  • The speaker discusses the constant reportage of a subjective world and the need to balance interpretation with objective action.
  • They express their enjoyment of being around people and bouncing off them, but also acknowledge the need for solitude at times.
  • The chemistry between the speaker and their podcast team is highlighted as a special aspect of the show.
  • The speaker mentions not having to worry about carrying the weight of being funny because they can bounce off the host for jokes.
  • They emphasize that reaching a destination is more important than how they get there, using humor as an example.
  • There is playful banter about remembering names and creating fictional song titles.
  • A humorous song about falling asleep on train tracks and losing a leg is mentioned.
  • The conversation touches on orgasms, daily routines, and an Apple Watch function related to John Mayer's work schedule.

John Mayer's Channel

58:09 - 1:04:13

  • John Mayer discusses his own SiriusXM channel, "Life with John Mayer," which curates music based on the time of day rather than genre.
  • He explains that algorithms and platforms like Spotify can limit musical variety and become claustrophobic.
  • The channel aims to provide synchronized music for different times of the day, such as mellow music at night and drive-time music in the morning.
  • John Mayer mentions that he enjoys hearing unexpected songs like "Since You've Been Gone" during his morning commute.
  • He humorously mentions dead air programming at 10 a.m. on his channel, jokingly referring to it as Throwback Tuesday with Kathy Ireland's Sports Illustrated from 1992.
  • The conversation veers into a lighthearted discussion about John Mayer's collection of adult magazines stored in a safe in his house.

Favorite Episode and Personal Reflections

1:03:50 - 1:07:09

  • The speaker mentions that this episode is one of their favorites.
  • They express admiration for someone in the crowd.
  • The speaker wonders why Conan keeps this person around.
  • The speaker appreciates the support they receive from someone named Blay.
  • They discuss their desire to do a good interview and gain recognition.
  • The speaker reflects on surviving difficult situations in life.
  • They mention a potential conversation with a doctor about their health.
  • The speaker expresses contentment with their current situation and career.
  • There is mention of actors hired for the podcast, including an oompa loompa character and someone measuring things.
  • John Mayer is thanked for being a guest on the podcast.